Learning to Share

As leaders, we need to learn how to share our art, not teach it.

One of the hardest concepts for new coaches and instructors to grasp is that you are sharing the art with others, not teaching it to them. Once you start to understand that your job is to share and grow from your experience in the arts and that sharing the art is part of the growing process, it will become easier to grasp. This concept of sharing relieves the pressure of "qualifying" to teach. The role of a Sifu comes with many responsibilities, and takes many years to achieve. In the meantime, students, coaches, and instructors grow the most when they learn to share their art and beliefs with others.

In learning to share the arts, we must learn to be comfortable speaking with others, especially others we have just met, or people we really do not know. The main ingredient in meeting new people is a sound introduction. The key to a sound introduction is to be relaxed. You have a few seconds to put someone at ease using your tone, eye contact, facial expressions, and of course, body language.

Tone: The tonality of your voice and its inflection need to be upbeat and friendly.
Eye Contact: Making eye contact is extremely important. If you do not make eye contact with the person you are speaking with, it will appear as if you are hiding something, making it difficult for them to trust you.
Facial Expression: Once eye contact is made, SMILE. Not a cheesy, family portrait smile, but a warm, friendly smile.
Body Language: Soften your posture. You are not leading a class, you are speaking to someone who may not be as familiar with Kung Fu as you are and who doesn't understand the proper protocol and etiquette that are associated with the arts.

The simplest way to soften your posture is to have your arms relaxed at your sides, not crossed. Crossing your arms will make you appear shut off, aggressive, and defensive. When standing, shift your body weight to one leg to avoid standing rigidly, which projects a level of severity that tends to turn off most people who do not understand the arts. When you extend your arm to shake hands, use a firm, warm handshake. Avoid both a soft and squishy, or hard vise-grip handshake.

To understand the use of voice, just remember that we are not drill sergeants or fast-talking used car salesmen. Be genuine, and speak clearly, confidently, and slowly enough for the person to understand you. Remember, we are not selling the idea of doing martial arts, but instead, sharing the opportunity for people to understand the practice and how it can enhance their lives.

You only have once chance to make a good first impression, and the impression you want to make is that you are someone who is confident and proud, as well as someone who really enjoys who they are and what they're doing.

It is likely that martial arts training has affected your life in some way or another, for the better. You didn't realize all you can get out of the practice, which is somehow slowly shaping you into the person you always wanted to be. Everyone who trains in Kung Fu eventually becomes someone a little different, a person with higher self-esteem and more confidence, who is able to enjoy the bliss and happiness of life.

We are willing to wager that your involvement in Kung Fu was almost an accident. Somehow you stumbled across a school, through a flyer or mailing or walking by, or maybe you were one of the lucky ones who knew someone who was training and got the courage to give it a try yourself. Nonetheless, you probably always had some form of interest in the martial arts, you just never thought of searching out a school for yourself. Do you know that there are thousands of people just like you? People who are just as interested in the martial arts as you were, but unfortunately, were not lucky enough to stumble across an opportunity to get started?

As students, coaches, and instructors, we need to understand that the people who need our help the most lack the confidence to seek us out to join the school. You must understand that the responsibility of a true martial artist is to help people. Through your training, you'll learn to get over your shyness, your apprehension, and your fear of rejection. Most importantly, you'll learn how to share the art with others.